In the grieving process, some days are just harder than
others. Today was a hard day. I don’t know if it was because of the
fact that I was anticipating something special that didn’t happen or if it was
because today was the first day that I really allowed myself to think of my
grandmother’s death.
My grandmother passed away Friday, April 18. In the weeks leading up to her death, I
dealt with a lot of anger. She
didn’t follow the doctor’s advisements.
She ate things that she wasn’t supposed to. She basically did everything that she should not do and
nothing that she should do. I
think that I felt that she was betraying us all by just giving up, and I was
really mad at her for that. But
when I walked into the hospital room to say goodbye, I realized that she had
been ready to go for so long. She
was ready to be with my mom. I was able to let my anger go at that
moment.
In the whirlwind of the next few days, I tried to forget
that I had lost another person in my life that I depended upon. I feel as though I have so few people left in my life.
